Friday, April 1, 2011

Dear LisaJune - you are an assferret

Dear LisaJune,

You are an assferret. You have atrocious grammar skills. We often wonder who taught you English and how in the fuck you manage to mangle it so fucking badly.

Now, you insult us and say "5 minutes to 5 years" as an acceptable time to wait for a response?? Just because you have to multitask???!!!??? Fucking fail, you stupid ass whore.

Find that gem of a fucking response here.

No, we're not holding back. You are a stupid motherfucking piece of shit. You and your cohorts insult all of us at every fucking turn. Don't think we don't know that you fucking make fun of us (that means all of us non-favorites - not just EB) behind our backs. Prancing through forums posting passive aggressive responses to Etc Regs - knowing full fucking well that they couldn't answer you. Checking this blog obsessively when we post and then attempting to make yourselves feel better about what we say.

Well, here - its out in the open - you are a failure at Customer Service. You wouldn't know good CS skills if it bit you in the ass and then waved hello at you afterwards. You are an utter failure. The only reason Etsy keeps you around is because you fit into their inner clique - not because you are actually good at what you do. You are a clone - just like the rest.. A dirty hipster clone.

Come work in our world honey, because we would eat you alive and spit you out like the trash you are.


Etsy Bitch


Marilyn said...

What the hell are you talking about?

t said...

To top it off, YESTERDAY I posted a question from a buyer only (bought from me at an art show) Has REAL NAME as USER name and wants to change it. I told her I don't know but I'll try to find out...

so I posted the question and got a Lisa-June answer in GASP a reasonable time ( a few hours) but it wasn't an answer to the question that I ASKED.

WTF etsy?! you continue to FAIL.

Eveline said...

Like people in that thread said, if you were to say anything like this in in the real world, you'd be kissing your job goodbye.

You do NOT talk to your customers like that, joking or not. You don't joke with your customers, you sort things. So what if you need to keep your eye on 5 things at once (is that all? Really??) guess what lady, that is your JOB. That's what you get PAID for.

This girl needs to needs to be relieved of her duties, pack her cowls and owls and LEAVE the Etsy building. Today.

The Funny One said...

lisajune has had an extremely nasty attitude from Day 1--she's just been left without supervision too long. (And we know Etsy didn't learn their lesson with DXO, so why now?)

It's clear that the 3 or 4 Admins who are popping up in the first few pgs of each thread (until they get bored and disappear) have no idea why that paycheck still ends up in their bank acct at the end of each week----------golly gee, they just keep showing up to run their mouths without consequences, ever!

Something is very rotten at the core of Etsy and lisajune is just another obnoxious Etsy product.

They breed them, then let them loose.

The Righteous One said...

*snort* assferret

sark said...

I've worked with people like LJ before. It always amazes me: because like her, they're incompetent.

But then, the condom jewelry she made will forever be cemented in the bowels of my memory so I get the emotional level we're dealing with.

I know someone who got a convo where the person who sent it told the receiver they were an ass. The receiver reported the convo and the staff member said something like 'we don't engage in personal disputes, you should resolve this yourself.'

So, the recipient of the 'you're an ass' comment was like, oh, would it be okay for me to send her a message telling her that she's a dumb cunt who I will never again use in a treasury or buy from?' - because that would be me resolving that in real life.

Etsy has no customer service skills and no dispute resolution skills. That they employ incompetent fucks like LJ is mind blowing. She's like a gaff machine. Every fucking thing she types — there will be some massive error.

You would think that they could program in a delay to her responses that has a computer read them aloud so that she could listen to see if there's something amiss. It should talk in that Stephen Hawking voice or the DC subway lady...

Discord Threads said...

Five years you say LJ? Wow, what great customer service... Or maybe the answer will just automagically appear and save you the trouble of a flippant 'Cheers'. Seriously though, I work in customer service, and if we gave our customers responses like your, we wouldn't have any customers. Etsy where the customer is NEVER right...

what a total asswipe said...

Poor LisaJune, she has a really rigorous demanding job as etsy forum moderator. Wait a minute, I forgot, ARE there still etsy forums that need moderating? Do moderators stroll through the team discussions and moderate there? She has no fucking idea what a demanding difficult job is. Where you have things like DEADLINES. Where you have THINGS CALLED CLIENTS, THAT DEMAND PERFECTION. I work for an advertising agency. I invite LisaJune to come do anybody's job at my company for 5 FUCKING MINUTES. She would be fired and escorted from the building.

Wendy Willingham said...

I have a fairly new Etsy shop, and I admittedly have felt many frustrations already. I've sold one item only since November, and that was a vintage item. I try to do what I think will attract being a "find", like using monthly birthstones in my handmade earrings, no luck so far. But, I have been very happy with the "help" section. I have used both email help and live help on several occasions. I think in one case I did not seem to get a response, but otherwise I have been pleasantly surprised. I think it's great that you are a site set up to challenge Etsy-no question the "little guys" are likely struggling within this now massive ssite (people like me). I am a freewheeling 60's survivor and I am not a prude. However, why is it helpful to those of us who are serious about considering if Etsy should be our site choice if all you do is rant and use the big F word time and again? Of course, up to you, you own this site-but as a subscriber I don't find this helpful. On the other hand, I thought it was great that you posted the INC article about Etsy, and the privacy thread was important and interesting. You fill an important role, but please keep it relevant and helpful. thanks.

Emily the Fabulous said...


Personally, if I don't reply to a customers question, comment or concern within 24 hours I feel like a complete shit.

WhoaThere said...

Really? Because my comment yesterday wasn't in agreement with this toxic post you didn't approve it? I just lost a lot of respect for this blog.

The Sneaky One said...

Dear Wendy,

You, darling, are a cupcake. Our job isn't to be a news outlet for Etsy. Our job is to call Etsy and its employees out on what they've done that's been shitty. Don't like the f-bomb? Don't read. We drop it often and whenever we want.

As for Whoa There - suck it. :D

Boy, Im feeling feisty these days.

Stifler's Mom said...

And doesn't it just warm the cockles of your hearts to see those two or three so very special cupcakes (we all know which ones I mean) ever ready to attack anyone who asks even the most innocuous questions. "Your questions aren't being answered because you don't ask them in the right way."

realbitchreader said...

RealLisaJune just mirrors the way the rest of etsy admin feel and treat the sellers.

She just forgot she was in the forum and not the IRC. (that's the etsy chat where admins call you out all day long)

Ask etsy admin about the IRC and watch those hipsters run for the hills.

assgerbil said...

I think Lisa June must have taken snark lessons from Daniellexoxoxoxox

We all know etsy hates it's sellers. Didn't Rob White tell her not to say so, so directly?

jackjustjack said...

At etsy you can be an "assferret" everyday and you still get a paycheck at the end of the week.

As long as resellers keep selling the money just rolls in. And they don't need "no stinkin customer service". Or help from fucking Lisa June.

Tired of Fools said...

HA!!! I saw that thread before LisaJune's delightfully childish comments and literally LMAO because I knew poor Quirke was never going to get an answer.

Then when that asshat "bead supply" or whatever the hell he/she/it is calling itself these days chimed in with such helpful remarks, I was positively rolling on the ground.

Ya, I remember asshat in the ArtFire threads before it got run out of there on a rail for personally attacking people in extremely childish ways. So asshat went back to Etsy to pose as a cupcake. Asshat thinks Quirke may have been rude? Asshat can write the book on rude.

But I digress. LisaJune has always been an idiot. Even when you do get an answer out of her it's so stupid and usually off subject that you are left scratching your head trying to figure out WTF she means.

Ooooo, LisaJune, you are so stressed having to watch 5 whole threads at once? Seriously? OMG, I cannot believe you said that. It's too stupid even for you. Get a life.

Oh wait, you can't because you wouldn't survive in the real world. Honey, hang on to Etsy for dear life because no one will hire you ever.

And, one final comment before I go. The only reason Admins constantly tell everyone to e-mail is because they don't want any public record of their responses. We are forbidden to share the information provided. Can we all say censorship?

Etsy is nothing but one big fat rip off and the biggest joke online.

Anonymous said...

Hey Wendy!
You have not had enough life experience with Etsy to understand much of what goes on there. I suggest you research the terms cupcakes, resellers, faux vintage, yard sale items, resellers, front page favoritism, muting, coralgate, closing shops without warning, random enforcement of rules, non efforcement of TOU (unless its something they want), release of personal information - opt out instead of opt in, the demise of search, resellers, Asian child labor sweatshop factory items, did I mention resellers?, violation of copyright laws, selling counterfeit items and a horde of other problems. Perhaps you would have some sense of the general reality of Etsy.
Sign me,
Sick of BS

Brie Oshiro said...

I'm actually getting sadder and sadder at what Etsy has become. I used to recommend it to friends to start shops and stuff. And I've bought some nice (handmade!!) stuff too. But I'm so tired of seeing the same crap and people on the front page. Doesn't anyone have any original ideas anymore? Is it even encouraged?

The Funny One said...

Let's pick our fave lisajune posts and repeat them here -- spark a little more attention to this Admin who has an avatar in shadow in front of 2 llamas and has started signing off with "Danke!"

lisajune snarking about the 15,693rd thread about 5-minutes-to-select FP Repeats:

LJ: "I very genuinely appreciate the frustration here. We do take measures to ensure that no one seller is featured disproportionately. I wish that they fully eliminated the perception that Front Page features shop inequitably.

"Etsy selects particular Treasury collections for the homepage based on seasonal themes, a strong display of item diversity from across many categories, and strong photos with clearly represented products."

lisajune then goes on for several MORE paras with a recommendation that, if you want to make a T that gets picked by Admin, is has to have what ETSY TELLS YOU TO MAKE AND LIST IN THEIR MONTHLY MARKETING REPORT!!!

The E tail keeps chasing the same E tail! oooh baby, act like an Admin, oh you hafta act like an Admin, la la, be an Admin, la la lo, dum dee dum.

Seinfeld said...

I don't think Wendy is a cupcake.

I think she's optimistic and admittedly new. And that's where a lot of us were, once upon a time.

Over time, it's inevitable that she'll be directly, indirectly, obliquely and transparently fucked by Etsycor. Or a close friend will. Or she'll see insanity and inequality applied firsthand.

It's inevitable.

Etsy will still behave like Etsy.

And eventually they burn or fuck everyone. Even the cupcakes.

Chantel said...

Is there a good link that I could check on the whole "What is a cupcake?" thing? Because really, this is just making me hungry.