Wednesday, September 17, 2008

Too little too late?

Imagine my utter shock today when I got an Etsy email! Wait wait, no it had nothing to do with the outages and failures this week that has been plaguing the site. No, it was a completely out of the blue announcement... VACATION MODE IS COMING!

Please visit this Storque post for a sneak peak of Etsy's upcoming feature, Vacation Mode. Vacation Mode allows a seller to put her shop on hold if she is out of town, sick, or otherwise wants to take a break from selling. We'll be rolling it out soon, so keep an eye out!

When in Vacation Mode, items in a seller's shop cannot be purchased. The seller's shop will appear empty, with a special vacation announcement. The seller's items can still be viewed via a direct item link (if they are linked from an outside blog for example), and can still be Hearted (added to favorites), but will not appear in site searches or the Category Browser. Buyers can sign up to be notified via email when the seller returns from Vacation Mode. See this Storque post to read more about how the new feature works. We hope you are excited about it!

Love, Etsy
Love? That closing line always throws me. The biggest part of love is communicating, darling, something you've sucked ass at this month. I am still filing for separation. You buying me a diamond ring doesn't make up for the fact you slept with my sister, stole my car and drove me to drink.

And the timing of this sends off major alarms. You can't make up for a massive failure of communication and total disregard by tossing up an announcement that the feature we've begged for for THREE YEARS is finally coming. (And yes we noticed there was no date on that promise. We're not holding out breath for it THIS year.)

You can't apply a bandaid to a huge gash and expect it to stop the bleeding. This is a desperate throwaway nicety to buy back the love and patience of it's sellers that Etsy has forsaken all this time. It's a cheap sleight of hand, and we see that card up your sleeve, asshole.

Let's just rewrite this notice for what it is:
When we fuck up we do it big time, it's our superpower. Our SuperDickery power doens't let us bother to let you know anything you need to know to run a functional storeforont. But that's okay, instead of bothering to send out service outage notes to every one with breaking news and interrupt the office naptime, instead we'll send one out to let you know vacation notice is coming in the future!!!! You've been bitching for it for fucking years, and we're finally kind of sick of playing Rockband and making fail hammocks enough to pull it out of our asses. Don't you love us again?

Now we'll direct you to the Storque article on this empty promise, and we'll be watching the forums so you can give our rightful handjobs and bask in the super nova-like glow of our egos.

See you later fools, Etsy

Fuck you too.

32 Comments:

Eveline said...

Like I said in my reply, 'lovely, when is soon?'

It would not have killed them to tell us when to expect this, or better yet, wait until it's actually in working order.

Impetuous said...

Sometimes I feel like the poor kid, who is expected to get excited when rich people throw canned food at my head.

Anonymous said...

yeah... it will be interesting to see when this vacation mode actually makes its debut. I'm not holding my breath for this year either.

Hyla said...

LOL "Fuck you too!"
~Hyla
http://earthyfinds.blogspot.com

Anonymous said...

Does that VW camper tote they've used to illustrate the piece count as trademark/copyright infringement?

Combustion Glassworks said...

my response on the thread was:
"AWESOME!





But, when?"


Maybe 2010..a 5 year total wait ;0

The Funny One said...

My sentiments exactly EB!
Better later than never? Nope.
Throwing a bone to the growling masses? Grrrrrrrrr, you didn't feed us for 3 years and now we're rabid........
but, love makes the world go 'round and Etsy just isn't capable of it..........nope.

Not one nice bone, tendon, vein, or hair amongst the whole lot of them.

Too late is too late for me, since my stuff, money, and hard earned business these next 11 weeks are going to sites that treat me like, well, a professional business!

The Ebon Swan said...

Anybody else see the irony of getting a vacation mode when the bulk of people have had their vacations for the year?

Kinda like having Christmas candy in May, y'know?

Unknown said...

What throws me is the fact that the screen shot of it is so old that it still says "Expiration Dates" instead of "Renew Items"
How long has this been ready to go? What were they waiting for?

Anonymous said...

Blogger impetuous said...

Sometimes I feel like the poor kid, who is expected to get excited when rich people throw canned food at my head.
______________________________

HaHaHaHaHaHaHaHaHaHa!!!!!!!!!!

Poor, sad little Etsy. No matter what you do people will always bitch about it. YOur timing is as good as a one legged potato sack racer.

Eveline said...

Oohh, good eye, Redd!

Anonymous said...

Vacation mode is such a teeny tiny issue for me, and probably for a lot of people. Nice, yes, but critical, no. Nice prioritizing.

ishi said...

Blogger impetuous said...

Sometimes I feel like the poor kid, who is expected to get excited when rich people throw canned food at my head.
--------------------------------
this deserves mention as quote of the week! hilarious!

Anonymous said...

Did anybody notice Matt closed the thread about the possiblity of being hacked and left his comment BLANK?

Anonymous said...

sulking said...

Does that VW camper tote they've used to illustrate the piece count as trademark/copyright infringement?

----

No.

Anonymous said...

Too little, way too late.

etsycorp is such a lame boyfriend type.

Smarty Pants said...

Well, it's certainly too late for me. I created my own vacation mode months ago by removing everything from my shop. I like vacation so much, I've decided to stay there indefinately.
love you, too, ets
kisses~!

PussDaddy said...

It wasn't really a thread about being hacked, hamster, it was a thread about being attacked. There is a little bit of difference. The sock puppet attacks were attacks.

Anonymous said...

While one can certainly understand seller frustration here, if I was Etsycorp, I sure as hell wouldn't be in any hurry to provide anything to a bunch of angry, hateful, unappreciative, discourteous ingrates like the ones I see on here.

Seriously. Being angry with the failures at Etsy is one thing. Taking it to the absolutely spiteful levels I've seen here? Knowing that people like you are who is selling on Etsy would be more of a turn-off for me than the lame business practices of Etsy itself.

Have you ever sat back and objectively read what you write here? I agree completely that Etsy has been run completely wrongly and poorly, but this nastiness in the name of "bitching because we love Etsy" is somewhat akin to abuse. You don't beat the hell out of someone to make them love you and give you what you want.

Just damn, people.

Anonymous said...

I don't know PD, I saw a lot of comments about possible hacking.

Anonymous said...

devils advocate said...
While one can certainly understand seller frustration here, if I was Etsycorp, I sure as hell wouldn't be in any hurry to provide anything to a bunch of angry, hateful, unappreciative, discourteous ingrates like the ones I see on here.

_______________________________

Well thank goodness you are not Etsycorp, because that wouldn't be a good position to take, business wise, that is.

Doesn't matter how much we bitch or seem ungrateful to others, we as sellers are still what makes money for etsy.

The Cranky One said...

Devil's Advocate: it's not that they don't offer this or that feature makes us angry, it's that Etsy seems to go out of it's way to blunder its own work and mission AND manage to insult it's own users in the process.

We are asking for Etsy to do what it promises. To step up and be the venue it claims to be. We are generous to give them credit when they deserve it or do something right - you can even find those posts here.

But this instance is an obvious distraction to draw away from another problem that they flubbed up - again. The fact they gave us a sneak peek, something they've never ever done before, solidifies that opinion. They wanted to gloss over that they let the site crumble into disarray and not send out any note tot he users or even get up the fix.etsy.com site (a site THEY TOLD US to refer to when there were problems) to assure people things were being worked on.

So, we do give credit when deserved, but we also call bullshit when we see it.

Anonymous said...

Cranky One, I understand calling bullshit. If you reread my comment, I agree with you that Etsy is a big bowl of fail. But my point was, listen to yourselves. I would not be in any hurry to provide anything to people who seem to relish being hateful and downright abusive. Yes, waving a flag in the collective drooling face of the Etsy staff is necessary and required, since they're making money off us. The method you're using to do it is what gives me pause.

I am completely a fan of calling bullshit. I'm just saying that while I'm not easily shocked, the general sucking death vortex of negativity that I've found on this blog is appalling.

You can keep up the pressure and the visibility of Etsy's ineptitude without standing at the gates with torches and pitchforks and screaming fuck you. Not only would it make it less easy for Etsy to ignore you, it also would raise your level of credibility. Instead of being a bunch of bitter and hateful agitators, you might actually be viewed as a credible voice.

Just my two cents. I know it isn't in line with the cool trend of who can out-sarcastic whom and who can come up with the best insult and cupcake-related sneers, but sometimes it needs to be said.

Anonymous said...

devils advocate says:

...if I was Etsycorp, I sure as hell wouldn't be in any hurry to provide anything to a bunch of angry, hateful, unappreciative, discourteous ingrates like the ones I see on here.

...You don't beat the hell out of someone to make them love you and give you what you want.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
First of all, really lame analogy. We don't want etsy to love us, we want customer service from a business to which we pay fees.

Old adage: The squeaky wheel gets the grease. Kindly take note of the features that are finally beginning to appear...and quit judging the bitches who are affecting change. If you see "bitter and hateful," I don't really care.

And sarcasm is fun. So sit on your courteous cupcake and twirl, 'kay?

Anonymous said...

Huh.

On the whole, I love this blog.

It's the anti etsycorp...it loads, it's timely in it's reporting, it's honest, to the point and I think it might actually get under their skin enough to light a fire of pseudo sanity under their lame brain asses.

It's been aver a month with no sexy murder spree fashion shows after all.
I like to think that the voice here may have something to do with that.

And when you're hunting for bullshit on the scale etsycorp provides it, you need a big gun and lots of ammo!

The Funny One said...

I do think you've made some very good points, devilsadvocate, and agree that whining and bitching can get old fast. But Etsy has not responding to begging, pleading, hundreds and hundreds of posts on the same 10 subjects, or whining and pleading in the forums (which gets you a big bad mute).

Etsy's attitude towards sellers changes weekly, as do their "rules" and how they apply them so arbitrarily-----but there is an underlying tone from Etsy that is snide, sarcastic, demeaning, disrespectful, and often outright offensive.

There is also a history of blurring of the line between personal and business on Etsy, and Etsy usually takes the side of making decisions based on personal opinions rather than what's good for the business overall.

EB takes the approach it does because there's just no other way to put it, after 3 years of being treated like an afterthought, sellers are frustrated and need to vent. Sellers can't do it on Etsy, and anyway, Etsy isn't listening. They're locking and muting, and turning off sellers before they finish reading one sentence.

EB puts a lot of time and effort deciding what issues to jump on, but, in the end, it's the comments from the EB readers that often have solutions to long-standing, chronic problems on the site. And, just like any other discussion board, it helps to know you aren't the only seller on Etsy having a bitch of a time running your own business on a site that keeps making it harder, not easier to do.

Anonymous said...

devils advocate said...
While one can certainly understand seller frustration here, if I was Etsycorp, I sure as hell wouldn't be in any hurry to provide anything to a bunch of angry, hateful, unappreciative, discourteous ingrates like the ones I see on here.

Seriously. Being angry with the failures at Etsy is one thing. Taking it to the absolutely spiteful levels I've seen here? Knowing that people like you are who is selling on Etsy would be more of a turn-off for me than the lame business practices of Etsy itself.

***********************************

I have seen "angry", yes. I have not seen "spiteful, hateful, unappreciative, discourteous ingrates" here in EB.

It's all in how each person perceives another. You see them one way, I see them differently, and another person sees them in another way.

I have seen the EBs give credit where and when and to whom credit is due. I have seen the EBs provide helpful info here. They tried giving helpful info to Etsy via the forum but were given the boot/mute. Etsy cannot handle criticism or the "TRUTH". Etsy owners/employees is where I see the "spiteful, hateful, unappreciative, discourteous ingrates". Not here.

Anonymous said...

Yay!!! Another sparkly toy for us to chew on...

Wait. We don't have it yet.

Shucks.

Ladies Auxilliary said...

I do really dislike the "Love, Etsy" sign off. You have to really consistently maintain a high level of delivery, respect and professionalism to pull that one off without looking like a total asshole.

But in other news, HOT DAMN...Vacation Mode sounds great...whenever it arrives...I mean we've been waiting for ever, why hurry, we can just tailgate til it gets here, I'll bring the beerz!

Ladies Auxilliary said...

Radicals do the dirty work for the middle, devil's advocate. In this case, the radicals happen to be sarcastic. The fact that you don't like the tone (or don't have a sense of humor) doesn't change the fact that Etsy's service hs been sucking for a long time. (and indeed I don't think you were actually disputing this). But as someone who spends a lot of time speaking up when other people don't (and not just in this context) it's kind of annoying to be told that you have to only speak your mind a certain way. Maybe you can go start your own blog, give it a flavor more to your liking and work it from the center...fine. The efforts can compliment one another.

The world's got way bigger problems than people with a crass sense of humor...like bad customer service.

Anonymous said...

It pisses me off to no end that etsycorp signs off with "Love".

Be professional, you bunch of overly familiar jagoffs.

The Funny One said...

After weeks of work on inventory for the upcoming holiday season (which Etsy has ignored completely) I just want to remind everyone that sellers continue to list on Etsy WITHOUT any tools that would help an online store operate effectively and efficiently.

Without ANY STATS but individual item views (which are completely unreliable, and may break at any moment again) all stores on Etsy have nothing else at all to work with to help them manage their stores.

Not one tool. No store visits, no traffic patterns for site visits, no history of visits by month, season, etc. No breakdown of where views come from.

For three entire years, stores have lived without statistics, and as we all get ready for one of the most difficult retail periods ahead, we have nothing to help us sell, pick and rotate inventory, consider price points, etc.

Nothing.

For 3 years. How many stores have failed on Etsy because they had no access to these basic tools? How many stores are going to close over the next 6 months because of the same problems?

Stores don't succeed on Etsy------they succeed DESPITE Etsy.